Darker side of light

I keep my head up high.
I keep my smile.
And, although I try.
I feel every pace is another mile.

I facade happiness.
I fake my being.
Inside is only sadness.
But it's something not worth seeing.

I say I have friends.
I pretend I am respected.
Both are false.
As you probably suspected.

I may feel sad.
But I am moved.
Knowing one person.
Makes me feel loved.

That may be enough.
But that's just for now.
I still have this huge burden.
Which I have to tow.

Pinned with hatred.
The subject of joke.
Rejected, as always.
By common folk.

Ragged around.
Tested and played.
Soon this wonderful facade.
Will break and fade.

Deep within.
This trauma gave me a new part.
Opposite to this pretence.
It is pure dark

I feel it.
I know it's growing.
So I let them.
All the while, never knowing.

I must be careful.
Try as I might.
Someone is going to send me too far.
And see this darker side of light.